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Children’s Issues in a Divorce

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It is the policy of the State of Texas to assure children will have frequent and continuing contact with both parents who have shown the ability to act in the best interest of the child. With this in mind, the courts in Texas favor joint managing conservatorships in which both parents share decisions about their child’s upbringing.

kids-and-divorce

The State of Texas also encourages every parent going through a divorce to submit a detailed parenting plan to the court before the judge issues a temporary or final custody order. The court will intervene only if the parents cannot reach an agreement.

Any divorce or child custody lawsuit has the potential of resulting in lasting harm to both the children and their parents. Most Texas family law judges are willing to accept a parenting plan that has been crafted by the parents with the guidance of their respective legal counsel, to fit that family’s unique traditions and cultural influences once the court has been shown that the parenting plan is in the best interest of the children.

Mediation is almost always mandatory when children’s issues are in dispute and before a no-holds-barred custody fight is played out in the courtroom.

Most divorces involving children name one parent as the primary Joint Managing Conservator and grant the other parent (also a Joint Managing Conservator) “Standard Possession Order” visitation. The visitation is spelled out in great detail in the statute (Texas Family Code Section 153.312) and should also be spelled out in detail in the Final Decree of Divorce.

The court may consider the following factors in determining conservatorship:

  • Whether a parent can provide a safe, stable and nonviolent environment for the child;
  • Whether a parent has participated in child rearing before the filing of the suit;
  • The geographical proximity of the parents’ residences once separated;
  • The physical and mental health, stability and moral character of both parents;
  • If the child is 12 years of age or older, the child’s preference, if any, regarding the person to have the exclusive right to designate the primary residence of the child;
  • Evidence of abuse or domestic violence; and
  • Other relevant factors.

Either or both parents may be ordered to make periodic, lump sum, or both types of child support payments. There are official child support guidelines set out in the statute and these are presumed to be reasonable and in the best interests of the child. The factors for consideration are: (1) the age and needs of the child; (2) the ability of the parents to contribute to the support of the child; (3) any financial resources available for the support of the child; (4) the amount of possession and access to the child; (5) the net resources of the parent to pay support, including the earning potential of the parent to pay support if the actual income of that parent is significantly less than what that parent could earn, if intentionally unemployed or underemployed;(6) any childcare expenses necessary for the employment of either parent; (7) whether a parent has custody of another child and any child support expenses being paid or received for the care of another child; (8) the amount of alimony being currently paid or received; (9) provisions for healthcare; (10) any educational or healthcare needs of the child, including college expenses; (11) any benefits a parent receives from an employer; (12) any debts or obligations of a parent; (13) any wage or salary deductions of the parents; (14) the cost of traveling to visit a child; (15) any positive or negative cash flow from any assets, including a business or investments; (16) any provisions for healthcare or insurance; (17) any special or extraordinary educational, healthcare, or other expenses of the parents or the child; (18) whether either parent has a car or housing furnished by an employer or other person or business; and (19) any other relevant factor.

The court may order health insurance coverage to be provided for the child. In addition, the court may order income withholding to secure the payment of child support. [Texas Codes Annotated; Family Code, Chapters 154.001 to 154.309].

The goal of any child custody or visitation dispute should be to obtain a fair resolution of that dispute so that the children in question can resume a stable and positive routine as quickly as possible either on a temporary basis or upon final settlement or trial of the matter. Choosing a Board Certified Family Law attorney who is comfortable in mediation, negotiation or in the courtroom is essential to obtaining that goal.

*Based on Texas Statutes; Family Code, Chapter 153

Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III is a Houston-based Board Certified Family Law Attorney and creator of The Guide to Good Divorce seminars for women. If you have questions about your Texas divorce or child custody issue, please contact The Law Office of Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III, P.C. for a consultation. If you’d like more information about Trey Yates’ upcoming Guide to Good Divorce seminars, please visit www.GuideToGoodDivorce.com or call 713-932-7177.

Don’t Let Divorce Derail Your Retirement

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despair

Image courtesy of Gloria Williams

If you are considering or going through divorce, it is likely that divorce will impact your retirement. However, the more knowledgeable you are about yours and your spouse’s finances, including your retirement benefits, and divorce law in Texas, the better prepared you will be to make sure divorce doesn’t derail your retirement.

You and your spouse will begin the divorce process by gathering together all your financial documents. This will include statements for all your retirement accounts — Individual Retirement Accounts (IRAs), 401(k) and 403 (b) accounts, and profit-sharing plans, as well as Roth IRAS and other pension plans. Increasingly, the variety and complexity of these plans may require some expert consultation or valuation during the divorce process.

You and your spouse will also be required to provide documentation on any other marital assets purchased during the marriage such as real estate, cash, stocks and bonds, automobiles, trust interests, businesses, stock options, valuable collections and more.

Working with your legal team, marital assets will be designated as community property or separate property, according to Texas divorce law. If the property was acquired by yourself or your spouse before marriage, it will likely be considered separate property and not subject to division in a divorce. Be prepared to provide documentation as to its origin. However, if the separate property has increased in value, that increase may be considered marital or community property, and thus, subject to division. If during your marriage, property was acquired through a gift, bequest, inheritance, law suit, etc., the asset may be your separate property even though it was acquired during the marriage.

All marital assets designated as community property should be appraised or valued. This may require special expertise, for example, if a family business or unique executive benefit packages are involved. Be cautious when comparing the dollar value of marital assets. A $100,000 IRA is not equal to a home with $100,000 in equity. Homes typically require ongoing maintenance and unexpected repairs; real estate values can also fluctuate dramatically in market downturns and may incur capital gains taxes when they are sold.

As you become knowledgeable on the financial aspects of divorce as well as divorce law in Texas, you will be in a better position to know what assets you want to secure from the settlement. Discuss your post-divorce goals with your divorce attorney. Then, map out a strategy designed to help you achieve those goals, without derailing your retirement plans.

Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III is a Houston-based Board Certified Family Law Attorney and creator of The Guide to Good Divorce seminars for women. If you have questions about your Texas divorce, please contact The Law Office of Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III, P.C. for a consultation. If you’d like more information about Trey Yates’ 2016 Guide to Good Divorce seminars, please visit www.GuideToGoodDivorce.com or call 713-932-7177.

The Traits Of The Best Divorce Lawyers

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During the run up to a divorce action, those involved are understandably under significant stress making it hard to find the best divorce lawyer to represent their position. The process of identifying the lawyer that suits you best is difficult at best and even harder when you’re not really sure what you are looking for.

There are a couple of important traits that the best divorce lawyers have:

    • Integrity: Any lawyer, including divorce lawyers, must be very honest with their clients; they should give an accurate, unemotional assessment of the strengths and weaknesses of your divorce case. The last thing you need at this time is a cheerleader. You do not want to hire a divorce lawyer that tells you everything is fine and you have no worries, if you hear these types of comments, keep looking.

 

    • Communication skills: You are facing an issue that probably you have not faced before, not so with your lawyer. You want a lawyer that can explain what is happening in layman’s terms and more importantly, one that is available to talk to you during the process. You and your lawyer should be in close contact, things happen during the process and you need to know the best way to react.

 

  • Patience: Going through a divorce is difficult and you have every right to be emotional. It’s OK for you but your lawyer must always be calm and pleasant. If the lawyer you are talking to tends to lose patience or speaks harshly to you or people in the office then don’t hire him. The best divorce lawyer will help you manage your emotions; you certainly don’t want to be around someone that will only make the emotional roller-coaster worse.

As well as having integrity, be a good communicator and be patient the best divorce lawyer will be objective, be skilled in a courtroom environment and ensure that all documents required are complete and filed with the court in a timely manner.

Do You Need A Prenuptial Agreement?

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Family Law
If you and your future spouse wish to have a clear and binding prenuptial agreement then it is advisable for both of you to engage your own family law attorney. However, long before you get the attorneys involved both of you need to decide on the terms.

Why is legal assistance needed?

Although the term is the same, the laws that govern prenup agreements are not from one jurisdiction to another. There is considerable information available on the internet that can help guide you but the actual agreement is best when drawn up by an attorney.

It is important that the agreement be drawn up by two independent attorneys. Prenup agreements are scrutinized very closely by the court, for the agreement to pass muster it is critical that each party to the agreement have their own family law attorney. Any agreement that is drafted without the advice of two attorneys is cause for concern for the court.

The court is one thing, having two attorneys helps both parties to develop an agreement that is fully understood, neither party will be left with the impression that they were taken advantage of.

Decide what is important and get good attorneys:

The couple must first try to develop the basis of a lasting agreement. It is difficult for a family law attorney to develop a meaningful prenup in the absence of something that has already been discussed and agreed upon. It is always best if the couple can give the attorneys at least an outline of their thinking, the end result will be well balanced and fair to all.

Both parties to the agreement should choose their own family law attorney, one that is seasoned in matrimonial law. The attorneys should also be capable of working together to create a long lasting, clear and fair agreement. It may take some time to find the right attorneys but it is well worth the effort, Contact to The Law Office of SAM M. (TREY) YATES, III, P.C. to know more information.

What Constitutes The Divorce Agreement?

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Divorce-Lawyer

A divorce agreement is a legally binding document that meets the expectations of both parties to a divorce. To reach the stage in the divorce action both parties will normally have hired their own divorce lawyer who will assist them in arriving at an agreement that is acceptable to both parties. Depending on the unique circumstances a divorce agreement can be quite complex but at its most basic it is simply a document that defines the division of all assets acquired during the term of the marriage, the handling of all liabilities, the determination of living arrangements and the custody and care of children if there are any.

Often the actual divorce agreement is preceded by a separation agreement. This agreement is often drawn up when the couple first decide that they wish to seek dissolution of their marriage. The preliminary separation agreement normally has a defined time period in which it is valid, it is during this time that the couple can give additional thought to the circumstances and decide if divorce is really the right way to deal with things. If the couple does go through with the divorce their divorce lawyer will find that the process goes considerably faster as much of the specifics were decided upon earlier.

The normal process is for one spouse to file for the divorce, it is at this time that the divorce agreement begins to take shape. Both the husband and wife will have their own lawyers, the lawyers first spend time with their clients and then the lawyers discuss the desires of the spouse they represent. These discussions include the sale or disposition of the family home, the division of monies held in joint bank accounts and the division of assets such as home furnishings, vehicles, etc. At the same time child custody and child support, as well as any spousal support, is discussed, if there is going to be any acrimony this is where it will take place. Eventually, the parties and their lawyers will reach an agreement but it is not legally binding until such time as both parties to the action have affixed their signatures to it.

It does not have to be difficult to arrive at an agreement, it can be quick and quite painless if the parties show flexibility and a desire to compromise. If the couple cannot compromise or they are fixed in their demands the process can drag on for quite some time. There will not be a divorce until such time as an agreement is reached and presented to a judge. In cases such as this, the divorce lawyer will usually have to draft several agreements before the divorce is finally granted.

What Is Family Law?

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Family law is a body of case precedents and statutes that govern the legal responsibilities of those involved in a domestic relationship. Those that are included are the husband, wife, grandparents, etc., usually anyone that that is a blood relation or one related by marriage. As many cases involving families are emotionally charged it is always a good idea to hire a family law lawyer who can view the issues without an emotional attachment.

The greatest majority of family law cases are the result of the termination of a marriage or other romantic involvement. A family law lawyer helps his or her client file the necessary pleas for divorce or legal separation. Child support, visitation, spousal support, etc. If the marriage has only lasted for a very short period of time it may be possible to have the union annulled and there are certain rights that same sex couples enjoy.

When a relationship is terminated there is always the issue of property division. The rules that apply to this are different from one jurisdiction to another but couples are not bound by law to follow the default rules as they can go into the marriage with a pre-nuptial agreement drafted by a family law lawyer.

Family law deals with far more issues than just the dissolution of a relationship and its associated complexities. Family law also involves issues which involve physical and emotional abuse. Although the majority of cases involving abuse are between couples, the law will not hesitate to intervene when it is necessary to protect an elderly family member, those who are still dating or even a roommate. The normal approach in cases involving abuse is for the court to issue a restraining order which prevents the parties from further contact.

Child custody is a very common dispute in a family court. Although in the majority of cases it is reasonable to assume that both parents are concerned with the safety and well being of their child, during a divorce action the parents are often distrustful of each other which leads to conflict. To the ruling judge the state of affairs of the marriage means nothing; the judge will always decide who is granted custody on what is in the best interest of the child or children.

As the child’s interests must be first and foremost the court can give one parent or the other custody or the court can decide that shared custody is best. In the case of shared custody the court will assign a custodial parent and give the non-custodial parent the right to spend weekends, the summer vacation and alternating holidays with the child.

With the recognition of gay relationships and same sex marriages, family law is changing and changing quickly; this makes it more important than ever to seek the assistance of a seasoned family law lawyer in the event of conflict.

Consider Alternative Dispute Resolution to Avoid Divorce Litigation

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by Houston Divorce Attorney Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III

While litigation is still an option for divorcing couples, many are turning to Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) options to save money, save time and more effectively control the outcome. Through ADR methods such as mediation, arbitration or collaborative law, couples may be able to avoid the courtroom, resolve differences, keep the details private, and possibly help create a post-divorce relationship that better meets the needs of their minor children.

In the greater Houston metropolitan area, most divorcing couples are required to at least try mediation before going to court. Mediators can be neutral attorneys, financial professionals or other trained professionals who know divorce laws. They should also be experienced in facilitating communication to help couples reach a settlement that is fair, meets as many of their individual needs as possible, and is in the best interests of their children. Mediators have no decision-making authority, unlike a judge or arbitrator.

Sometimes mediation does not result in a settlement agreement. If this occurs, the couple may try a second mediation, participate in arbitration (where a judge or attorney hears the parties, reviews the numbers and makes the decisions), or proceed to litigation.

Couples facing divorce may want to explore a relatively new ADR option for legally ending marriage called collaborative divorce. This approach emphasizes cooperation over confrontation and problem-solving over grievance-airing, and was developed as a way to minimize battles over property division, legal bills and emotional anguish of a traditional divorce process.

Here’s how collaborative divorce works. Divorcing couples agree in writing to forgo the courts and work together on developing a fair settlement. In the collaborative process, while couples may not always agree on everything, they are encouraged to try to understand each other’s needs, interests and point of view. This is designed to enhance trust, reduce hostility and facilitate a settlement that works for everyone.

In a collaborative divorce, each spouse is assisted by a lawyer so they have the benefit of individual counsel. All negotiations take place during four-way meetings with both parties and their lawyers. Attorneys gather documents, guide settlement meetings and strategize with their clients.

One significant drawback to the collaborative approach occurs if the process breaks down and the couple cannot agree on a settlement. Both collaborative attorneys who worked on the case must withdraw and each spouse must hire a new attorney — essentially going back to square one. This is likely to prolong the divorce process and increase costs.

ADR options are not for everyone. In order for these approaches to be meaningful, effective and fair, both spouses should have relatively equal “bargaining power,” and should not be overly emotional, angry, fearful or intimidated by the other. ADR options also may not be appropriate for the mentally or emotionally incapacitated, or anyone struggling with substance abuse or domestic violence. In addition, full disclosure is required and both individuals must be fully informed of all relevant issues – i.e. legal rights, assets and liabilities, etc. Free download Finances before, during and after divorce

Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III is a Houston-based Board Certified Family Law Attorney and creator of The Guide to Good Divorce seminars for women. If you have questions about your Texas divorce, please contact The Law Office of Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III, P.C. for a consultation. If you’d like more information about Trey Yates’ 2015 Guide to Good Divorce seminars, please visit www.GuideToGoodDivorce.com or call 713-932-7177.

 

 

 

Traditional Will or Revocable Living Trust?

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Last Will And Testament by Ken_Mayer, on Flickr
Creative Commons Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic License   by  Ken_Mayer 


By Houston Probate Attorney Estelee Garrison

In recent years, the Revocable Living Trust has increased in popularity as an alternative to the traditional Last Will and Testament as an estate planning document, especially among the baby boomer generation. However, a living trust may not be the best solution for your needs, depending on your particular circumstances, and careful comparison and consideration is certainly called for.

How Does a Revocable Living Trust Differ From a Traditional Last Will and Testament?

A Last Will and Testament (will) is a legal document that becomes effective upon a person’s death, and specifies the division and distribution of his or her estate. To be effective, a will must meet certain legal requirements, be submitted to a court of competent jurisdiction, and withstand potential challenge as to its authenticity and validity, a legal process known as Probate. A Revocable Living Trust (living trust) also specifies the division and distribution of an estate, but since it exists before the death of the person who created it, its validity does not need to be acknowledged by a probate proceeding. And, it is referred to as “revocable” because the creator can make changes to or even dissolve the trust at any time and for any reason, as long as he or she remains mentally competent. A Revocable Living Trust becomes irrevocable upon the death of the creator.

In many cases, a living trust can be created more quickly than a will, and becomes effective upon creation or per the instructions of its creator. It is also more private than a will because, among other things, it bypasses the probate system and is not required to be filed among the court’s records. A living trust also tends to centralize the administration of a person’s estate after death, making it easier for that person’s heirs by having much of what would be needed for the estate administration collected all in one place. These are among the qualities that make living trusts increasingly popular.

How Does a Living Trust Work?

The person (or persons, in the case of married couples) who creates and funds a trust is called the Grantor. The person who manages the assets in a trust is called the Trustee. A person who receives income or principal from the trust is called a Beneficiary. The grantor can transfer part or all of what he owns into the trust, and can include real estate, bank accounts, insurance policies, stocks, etc. In most cases, the grantor of the trust names himself as the initial trustee and the initial beneficiary of the trust. The trust, in effect, becomes a “holding bin” for the grantor’s assets for the remainder of his life, or until he dissolves the trust. The trust will also identify who is to take over as trustee upon the passing of the grantor, or if the grantor becomes mentally incompetent and therefore unable to manage the trust. That subsequent trustee will then assume the task of administering the trust according to its terms. The terms of the trust may instruct that beneficiaries will begin receiving from the trust prior to the passing of the grantor, or distributions may not start until the grantor has passed.

Will A Living Trust Help My Heirs Save on Probate Expenses?

In many states—especially those with complicated administration procedures—living trusts are marketed as an ideal way to avoid the high cost of probate. In Texas, however, administering an estate according to the terms of a will can be an expeditious and economical way to distribute an estate. Most wills prepared according to Texas law include specific terms which instruct that the executor named shall be allowed to handle estate business without bond and without on-going court supervision and approval. One must keep in mind, however, that living trusts are usually more complicated than wills, and therefore typically cost more to be created. In addition, living trusts will require that the grantor formally change ownership of all real and personal property to reflect being owned by the trust. One detail that is often overlook is the fact that any of the grantor’s assets not held in trust at the time of his death, including assets obtained after the trust was created, will pass under the terms of the grantor’s will or, if the grantor did not have a will, according to the heirship provisions of the Texas Estates Code.

When is a Living Trust a Good Idea?

You may want to consider a living trust if any of the following situations apply to you:

  • You Own Real Property in Another State — If you are a Texas resident and own real estate in a state other than Texas, a living trust could prevent the necessity of a probate proceeding in the other state.
  • Impending Mental Incapacitation — If your age or medical condition is such that you have a reasonable fear of soon becoming incapacitated, then a well-drafted living trust could make it easier for your designated trustee and heirs.
  • Incompatibility or Dissent Among Your Heirs – Heirs often tend to be more likely to fight over the administration of an estate in court. Some theorize this is because their relative has passed, and so cannot see their bad behavior or consider them greedy. If disagreement tends to erupt easily among your heirs, a living trust may be a more effective way of making sure your wishes are followed after you’re gone.

Estelee Garrison is a Houston-based attorney specializing in the areas of probate and trust administration, guardianship, estate planning, and business succession planning with particular attention to high net worth planning. If you have questions about estate planning, please contact the Law Office of Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III, P.C. for a consultation.

Choosing the Best Divorce Attorney For You

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by Houston Divorce Attorney Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III

If you are preparing to get a divorce, or just considering it, it is a good idea to begin by finding the right attorney for you. Divorce is a big step. It is an intense emotional and psychological experience, but it is also a legal process and in fact, it is a lawsuit.

You need to arm yourself with knowledge in order to make the most informed decisions. The settlement you secure is likely to impact your life for many years to come.

All attorneys are not equally skilled. For example, the lawyer you hired to negotiate a real estate transaction or draft your will, is likely not the best choice for handling your divorce.

Select an attorney who has the right skills, knowledge, experience and personal qualities that fit your case and your philosophy. By carefully selecting someone you can trust and someone who will protect your legal interests, you will be better prepared to focus on yourself and your family during this difficult time.

Skills and Knowledge

In the state of Texas, an excellent way to separate the “wheat from the chaff” when looking for a qualified divorce attorney, is to look for one who is certified by the Texas Board of Legal Specialization in family law and divorce. Of the more than 70,000 attorneys licensed to practice in Texas, only 7,000 have earned the right to be publicly recognized as board certified specialists in one of 21 select areas of law. Board certified attorneys must pass rigorous testing, have significant trial experience and take about twice as much continuing education as non-board certified family law attorneys.

Each state is unique in its laws, so it is vital your attorney stays up-to-date on legislative changes that could affect your case. Plan to interview several attorneys before deciding on one.

Experience

Ideally, you want an attorney who is good in court and out. Do not assume yours has extensive courtroom experience. Ask. If you do need to go to court, it is very important that your lawyer is familiar with the system and its complexities, as well as how specific judges like to work.

If children are involved, secure an attorney with specific experience in this area. A quality attorney will recommend that during your divorce you put the children’s needs first. He or she will also not pursue unreasonable demands for child support or vindictive child custody and visitation arrangements. Texas law requires family law judges to consider the best interests of the child in determining custody and visitation.
When it comes to child support, the court may use a complicated formula to determine what a parent pays. This includes such factors as the cost of providing healthcare coverage for a child and other factors.

Style, Personality and Philosophy

It is also important to find a divorce lawyer who is on the same page as you when it comes to how your divorce is managed. When interviewing attorneys, consider your case and the various aspects of your divorce.
Ask how an attorney would typically handle a case like yours. If the approach does not make sense to you, ask if he or she would be willing to consider a different approach. The response should speak volumes. Also choose a lawyer you like, because personal qualities count as well. Also, consider how you communicate with each other during the interview.

Here are a number of ways to start building a short list of good divorce attorneys to interview.

  • Ask family and friends but do not rely solely on their recommendations
  • If you know some attorneys, ask them who they would recommend for your divorce and why
  • Ask your accountant or financial planner
  • Ask your therapist or contact members of divorce support groups
  • Check with family law mediators
  • Ask marriage counselors who advise divorcing couples
  • Check with the local or the state bar association for a list of family law attorneys who are board certified and experienced in divorce cases
  • If you know someone who has recently gone through a divorce, you may also want to contact them for a referral or just to gather advice and tips

Once your list is drafted, contact two or three attorneys who best fit your needs and set up consultations.
Some attorneys will charge for this meeting, others won’t. Make sure you prepare a thorough list of questions for the consultation ahead of time, and try to limit your meeting to about an hour.

Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III is a Houston-based Board Certified Family Law Attorney and creator of The Guide to Good Divorce seminars for women. If you have questions about your Texas divorce, please contact The Law Office of Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III, P.C. for a consultation. If you’d like more information about Trey Yates’ 2015 Guide to Good Divorce seminars, please visit www.GuideToGoodDivorce.com or call 713-932-7177.

 

5 Things You Need to Do When Preparing for a Divorce

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by Houston Divorce Attorney Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III

Happy New Year! As we move into 2015, news headlines and social media are abuzz with tips on how to eat healthier, get more exercise, organize our homes and offices, etc. As a family law attorney, experienced in divorce, I also see many individuals this time of year seeking to end marriages that no longer work for them. Divorce is rarely easy and most do not enter into the process lightly. For those facing the prospect of divorce this year, here are five important areas to consider; I call them the Five Keys to a fuller, happier and healthier life after divorce.

1. Securing legal representation

Seek legal advice early if you are considering divorce, even before you have made a decision. Becoming acquainted with divorce law in your state and discussing your specific situation with a skilled family law attorney — experienced in divorce and Board Certified by the Texas Board of Legal Specialization in Family Law — will help you make informed decisions moving forward. Topics to discuss include the timing of your filing, your spousal rights under Texas law, temporary orders, what is separate and what is community property, how your current financial situation will impact your case, who qualifies for spousal maintenance, and much more.

2. Sorting out your finances

One of the most important aspects of the divorce process involves finances. For your own well being and long-term happiness, gain a clear understanding of your finances ASAP. Don’t allow emotions to impact this area. Decisions made during the divorce process with regard to your finances will impact the rest of your life. Here are some questions to consider as you set emotions aside:

  • What happens to the family home?
  • What kind of child support/spousal support should I expect?
  • What about pensions and social security benefits?
  • What about dividing retirement plans?
  • What are taxable and non-taxable assets?
  • What about executive benefit plans such as stock options and restricted stocks?
  • What are the tax implications of your divorce?

This component of divorce can get complicated. You may also want the help of a financial analyst with knowledge of divorce rules who can help calculate an equitable division of assets based on individual circumstances and divorce law. Develop a balanced financial plan with regard to income, expenses, assets and investments.

3. Refreshing your life skills

Your lifestyle is likely to change dramatically following divorce. Now is the time to think about and plan for what lies ahead. Your future is in your hands and, maybe for the first time in your life, you have the freedom to pursue long-forgotten dreams or goals. How will you support yourself? Maybe it’s time to get that master’s degree. You may have always wanted to open a bed-and-breakfast in the Texas Hill Country, move to the mountains, visit remote regions of Asia or teach school. Whatever your dreams, now is the time to plan and prepare for how you will make them a reality.

4. Attaining a renewed state of wellness

Many women focus on their husbands and families for much of their lives. As you begin to transition through divorce, now it the time to focus on yourself and your needs – physical, psychological and spiritual. Now is also a great time to experiment and try new things. Try a new hairstyle and maybe, a new hair color. Take a painting class. Update your wardrobe with some new pieces. Sign up for a yoga class or get a personal trainer. This is also a great time to clean closets and donate what you no longer want. Out with the old and in with the new — you!

5. Making new friends and connections

Some of your “couple” friends may or may not make the transition with you through divorce, so plan now to look for opportunities to make new friends. Your church or place of worship may offer events and activities for singles. Another good idea is reaching out and reconnecting with old friends. There is also the whole world of online dating if that sparks your interest.

Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III is a Houston-based Board Certified Family Law Attorney and creator of The Guide to Good Divorce seminars for women. If you have questions about your Texas divorce, please contact The Law Office of Sam M. “Trey” Yates, III, P.C. for a consultation. If you’d like more information about Trey Yates’ 2015 Guide to Good Divorce seminars, please visit www.GuideToGoodDivorce.com or call 713-932-7177.

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SAM M. (TREY) YATES, III, P.C. 2003.

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